The lesson ~ "Steadfast and Immovable"

I had to give a lesson ( should say I "got to" give a lesson) in another Ward Conference on Sunday to teach about this years Mutual Theme "Steadfast and Immovable, always abounding in good works" from Mosiah 5:15 in the Book of Mormon.

It is such a good thought and I had plenty of time to study and prepare, but I get soooo nervous talking in front of people, really really nervous. Plus I was teaching with one of the members from our Stake Presidency heap on the pressure. I was physically ill almost all weekend over it.

I thought it would be easier teaching youth from a different Ward, because they wouldn't know me or any of my short comings. But it was actually harder, because I didn't know them, and where I could pick on youth I knew and make them answer questions or read something for me, when you don't know them, they say NO way too easy!! And if you push them, you don't know which ones will break vs. which ones will break down. So I felt really really alone trying to teach.

I think if I could have ever gotten over myself enough, I could have taught the lesson just fine, but I was so full of fear and anxiety... I don't think my message was very clear.

If it didn't reach anyone else, at least it touched me, I learned so much preparing and praying about what to specifically teach the youth. I hope that counts for doing something good for me!

I think I can be a good teacher, and effective... (in other settings and in different ways) but the classroom setting is just not my thing! I hope I get over that some day... but I am afraid the only way... is to do MORE OF IT, and I really don't want to be praying for that!